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==b0600000== {{spoiler|start}} (Character) reads the sign. "The desert bazaar done finished an' moved on. We traders would like to thank y'all for yer patronage." Hank Hoffman Jr.: Howdy, Hero, ol' pal! It's been a while, huh? It's me, Hank Hoffman Jr., remember? Hank Hoffman Jr.: I done finished my apprenticeship with ol' Ilton, an' now I'm a-settin' up by myself. Hank Hoffman Jr.: I figured I might as well follow in the ol' coot's footsteps and set me up a boom town like dear ol' Mintos. Hank Hoffman Jr.: But I cain't very well jes' make a town out in this here wilderness all on my lonesome now, can I? Hank Hoffman Jr.: Which is why I thought I might ask you globe-trottin' varmints a little favour. Hank Hoffman Jr.: Can y'all git out there and find some folks with itchy feet, and tell 'em about the newest town in town? Hank Hoffman Jr.: I seem to recall hearin' about someone who was jes' itchin' fer a new life hangin' around in the church down there in little ol' Laissez Fayre. Hank Hoffman Jr.: If we can git us together a sizeable crowd on this here prairie, we'll be able to build us a mighty fine metropolis in no time flat. Hank Hoffman Jr.: I need me a couple o' helpin' hands to git this here town o' mine started. Hank Hoffman Jr.: I seem to recall hearin' about someone who was jes' itchin' fer a new life hangin' around in the church down there in little ol' Laissez Fayre. Hank Hoffman Jr.: If y'all come across anyone like that, you'll tell 'em all about my little frontier town here, won't you now? Hank Hoffman Jr.: If we can git us together a sizeable crowd on this here prairie, we'll be able to build us a mighty fine metropolis in no time flat. (*): Peace be with you. I am an itinerant nun. I set out from my motherland to aid those in need in any way I could. (*): If I could find myself a fledgling settlement somewhere, I am sure I could be of great use to its inhabitants. Do you want to tell her about Hank Hoffman Jr.'s frontier town? (*): So this Mr. Hoffman is establishing a town of his own? (*): My humblest thanks! I shall make my way there forthwith. (*): Farewell, travellers. I pray that you settle in your promised land. Hank Hoffman Jr.: Seems I owe y'all a debt o' thanks, Hero, ol' pal! Folks've finally started flockin' to this little ol' prairie town o' mine! Hank Hoffman Jr.: Now, I can't rightly say it pleases me a whole heck of a lot to presume upon on yer goodwill again like this, but... Hank Hoffman Jr.: There's some folks I'm jes' itchin' to bring on down here to join the party. Whaddya say, pardner? Will ya look 'em up fer me? Hank Hoffman Jr.: Aww, c'mon now, don't be a stubborn ol' sourpuss! You'll help ol' Hank, won'tcha? Hank Hoffman Jr.: Why, thank you! Hank Hoffman Jr.: These good people done helped me out a bunch back when I was studyin' the ways o' the wise over there in Mintos. I figured they might help us some here too. Hank Hoffman Jr.: But what with bein' busy buildin' this here town an' all, I can't rightly go chasin' after the varmints my own self... Hank Hoffman Jr.: Whaddya say, good buddy? I know it's a lot to ask, but could ya pass on word o' what we're doin' here? Hank Hoffman Jr.: They're in the hotel business. Newlyweds, just startin' out in the innkeepin' trade. Hank Hoffman Jr.: An' if y'all could see yer way to tellin' ol' Conrad 'Ilton hisself that Hank's busy buildin' the future out here while yer there, then all the better! Hank Hoffman Jr.: Much obliged! Y'all take care out there, now, y'hear? (*): Was a guy, Hoffman, studied over at 'Ilton's place back a-ways. Used to be he stayed here all the time. (*): Crazy dreamer was always talkin' about settin' up a town all his own. (*): But I ain't heard nuttin' from him in who knows how long. Sure hope he's doin' okay... Do you want to tell him about Hank Hoffman Jr.'s frontier town? (*): Say what? You know the guy? Well I'll be! (*): Thanks for lettin' me know he's doin' good, pal. Sounds like he's got a good thing goin' over there. I'm Rocky, by the way. Rocky: Y'know, I figure I might head over there myself. Ain't no time like the present, huh? Rocky: Wait, what am I, stoopid? I gotta check wid Adrian first! Rocky: That's my lady, see? She's over at the church just now. Rocky: What kinda knucklehead runs off widout his beautiful new wife, huh? They oughta put me in the nuthouse! (*): Hang on in there, Hoffman, old pal... Wherever you are... (*): Dear Goddess in heaven... Please, watch over my Rocky... Don't let him get hurt out there... (whisper) Do you want to tell her about Hank Hoffman Jr.'s frontier town? Adrian: Huh!? You're tellin' me my Rocky's fixin' to head out wherever that daydreamer Hank Hoffman's set down his ten-gallon hat now? Adrian: It's nice o' him to look out for his friends and all, but would it kill the guy to talk wid me about it first, huh? Adrian: And him only just now gettin' used to this new line o' work... Adrian: But if it's what my Rocky wants, who am I to stand in his way? Adrian: It's Hero, right? Thanks for lettin' me know. Maybe we'll see you over there in whatever prairie outpost old Hoffman's put together, huh? (*): Mutter... Mumble... Conrad 'Ilton: You wot? So old 'Offman's gone and set 'imself up in business wiv a town of 'is own, eh? Conrad 'Ilton: Well, 'e may 'ave 'is spot picked out, but is anyone in the market for wot 'e's sellin', I wonder? Can't 'ave a town wivout people now, can ya? Conrad 'Ilton: Mind you, we got a few more freshly trained top-tier salesmen round 'ere than I'm completely comfortable wiv, if I'm honest. Conrad 'Ilton: If I send 'em 'is way, they won't be round 'ere to bovver me no more... It'll give the lad a chance to get 'is town goin', an' all... Conrad 'Ilton: Heh, listen to me, gettin' soft in me old age! Don't tell 'im I said that last bit, will ya? Heh heh! Conrad 'Ilton: 'E's listened to more than enough of my old claptrap anyway. Ain't nuffink more I can teach 'im. Let's see 'ow the lad stands on 'is own two feet... Conrad 'Ilton: So the punters've started flockin' to old 'Offman's outback outpost, 'ave they? Conrad 'Ilton: 'E's not as green as 'e's cabbage-lookin', that one. 'E might just end up bein' mayor of a sizeable settlement after all! (*): Hey, have you heard? (*): No you haven't. Stop messing around. (*): Well, they're saying someone's built a new town over near Zamoksva somewhere. (*): I reckon I might take my trade over that way and see how I do. There's too many merchants in this place already. (*): I haven't got the foggiest who runs the place or what it's like, but it's worth a try, right? Nothing ventured, nothing gained, and all that. Do you want to tell him about Hank Hoffman Jr.'s frontier town? (*): What's that? You know the man who founded the place? And he did his training here in Mintos? (*): Well, that's great news. You've put my mind completely at ease. I'll set off right away! (*): Wish me luck on the new frontier! (*): But can I really take the risk...? It's a big move, after all... Rocky: Say, if it ain't my old buddy Hero! Rocky: Seems I got you to thank for talkin' Adrian round, huh? I owe ya. Rocky: We'd never 'a come here widout you gave her that little pep talk. Rocky: But now we made it all the way out here, I can't figure out is she happy, or is it the dumbest thing I ever did? Rocky: I mean, ain't much here to speak of... Adrian: (sigh) It's kinda...barren out here, huh...? Adrian: But that don't matter none. Wid my Rocky by my side, I got all the clutter I need! (*): Hey, have you heard? (*): Yeah., that makes sense, I suppose. You're a traveller after all... (*): Well, they say there was a great big bazaar being held here until only recently. (*): Seems like that might have been a better time to set up shop... (*): But I shouldn't complain. I'm one of the first to establish themselves in a brand new market. I'm perfectly placed to make a killing! Hank Hoffman Jr.: Seems it's y'all I gotta thank for all the Mintosian merchants headin' out to these parts lately. Hank Hoffman Jr.: Say, if y'all are ever back over that way, you think you might tell the couple workin' over there at the inn about this little ol' place too? Hank Hoffman Jr.: Them folks sure did treat me good back in my trainin' days. I'd dearly love to be able to repay the courtesy they done did me... Hank Hoffman Jr.: Seems it's y'all I gotta thank for my good friends Rocky 'n' Adrian makin' the trip all the way out here, huh? Hank Hoffman Jr.: Say, did that old coot Conrad 'Ilton have anythin' to say for his sly old devil self? Hank Hoffman Jr.: It's been a good ol' while now since I heard from the fella. I surely do hope all's well... (*): Peace be with you. I am the itinerant nun with whom you met previously. I thank you wholeheartedly for teaching me of this place. (*): I am consulting with Mr. Hoffman on how I might best be able to aid the citizens of this fledgling parish. This must be Rocky's wife, Adrian... (Character) reads the sign. "This here town o' pioneers done gone and got itself started up real good! Yeehaw!" Hank Hoffman Jr.: Sorry, pardner, I done got this ol' house up an' built at last, but things is hardly in what you might call apple-pie order jes' yet... Hank Hoffman Jr.: Why don'tcha have %D120%Xyourself/yourselves) a stroll around town there, 'til such time as I'm fully prepared? Hank Hoffman Jr.: I seen me a mighty strange frog down by the pond there. Hank Hoffman Jr.: I guess an oasis way out in a desert such as this'll bring all manner o' critters out to play, even froggies. Hank Hoffman Jr.: And dunk me in a gully if it don't fit the place like a rootin'-tootin' glove! Yeehaw! Hank Hoffman Jr.: But hold yer horses there, Hank... Ain't but the start o' this here venture... It's a tad bit soon to start a-whoopin' an' a hollerin'... Hank Hoffman Jr.: Why, we got us an inn now, an' more 'n' more folks're comin' here every day. Hank Hoffman Jr.: It's mighty lucky I done stayed back here to keep an eye on things - I been busier'n a coal miner's wife on washday! Y'all keep up the good work, now! Hank Hoffman Jr.: Well, howdy, Hero! Did y'all hear the news? We done gone an' started buildin' us a gosh-durned Pioneeratorium! Yeehaw! Hank Hoffman Jr.: Well, don't that just beat all! (Pioneer Town)'s gotten so gosh-durned big, I can't barely believe it! Hank Hoffman Jr.: An' it's all thanks to y'all. Why, I don't rightly know what to say. But there's still room for the ol' girl to grow, you know! Hank Hoffman Jr.: Howdy y'all! Welcome back! Hank Hoffman Jr.: Whaddya make o' the ol' place now, huh? A castle! I had me some high hopes for this town, but a castle? Why, I never expected that! (*): The beauty of this garden sets my mind at peace. I pray that I can be of use to you in some way. Hank Hoffman Jr.: Well, if it ain't my good buddy Hero! I jes' done got finished gittin' everythin' ready, an' I'm all set to put this show on the road at last! Hank Hoffman Jr.: Say, yer a reg'lar brainbox - how's about you help me give the place the kinda name'll git folks flockin' here like flies on fertilizer? Hank Hoffman Jr.: I done thunk me up a doozie or three, but I can't fer the life o' me pick between 'em. Hank Hoffman Jr.: Y'all've been helpin' me git the place together an' all. Seems only right you should have a say in what folks wind up callin' this one-horse town. Hank Hoffman Jr.: I'll rattle off a coupla ideas, an' y'all can tell me yer favourite. Here goes: Hank Hoffman Jr.: Okay, well first off, I thought about "Herotown". It's a mighty purdy name, ain't it? Hank Hoffman Jr.: Well, I jes' knew it! Ain't that swell! Herotown it is, then! Yeehaw! Hank Hoffman Jr.: Well, I guess it ain't the excitinest I ever did hear. Okay, try this next one for size: Hank Hoffman Jr.: How's about "Herosville"? It's named fer yourself there, Hero. How about it? Hank Hoffman Jr.: Well, I jes' knew it! Ain't that swell! Herosville it is, then! Yeehaw! Hank Hoffman Jr.: Well, I thought as much. I knew you wouldn't be none too keen on that one, so I saved the best 'til the very last: Hank Hoffman Jr.: Here goes... How's about..."St. Herosburg"? Not bad, huh? I'm mighty proud o' that one! Hank Hoffman Jr.: You're kiddin'! Y'all actually like St. Herosburg? I never thought that'd be the one'd take yer fancy! Still, much obliged. Hank Hoffman Jr.: Aww, shucks. Seems I ain't cut out fer the town namin' game. Hank Hoffman Jr.: Then there ain't nothin' for it but to let you decide, Hero, ol' pal. Hank Hoffman Jr.: Come on now an' gimme a name'll git 'em cheerin' fit to beat the band. I mean a real humdinger! Sorry, but you can't have that name. Hank Hoffman Jr.: What the!? After all yer dilly-dallyin', y'up an' went fer one o' my names anyways? Hank Hoffman Jr.: Well gee, I guess they was some mighty fine ideas an' all. I can't rightly blame y'all for pickin' one! Hank Hoffman Jr.: (Pioneer Town), y'say? Why, that's a purdy name! I coulda never 'a thought o' somethin' so grand! Hank Hoffman Jr.: Alright then, we'll name our little ol' township (Pioneer Town), agreed? Hank Hoffman Jr.: Alrighty! We done got ourselves a name! Hank Hoffman Jr.: A purdy name's nice an' all, but it ain't nearly enough... The real hard work starts right about now... Hank Hoffman Jr.: And it starts with gittin' the word out so's folks'll be flockin' here like ministers to moonshine! Hank Hoffman Jr.: Reckon I'll stick around these parts. Ain't no knowin' how busy things'll git once y'all start workin' yer posse-musterin' magic. Hank Hoffman Jr.: Well, alright then, I guess we better go back and start over. Hank Hoffman Jr.: Other 'n that, ain't been a whole lot for me to help folks with since they all got done settlin' in... Hank Hoffman Jr.: But I'll be durned if I ain't gittin' ahead o' my ol' fool self - why, this town don't even got itself a name to speak of! Hank Hoffman Jr.: I'll be here to show new folks the ropes an' git 'em settled in. Keep the town tickin' over, if y'all git my meanin'. Hank Hoffman Jr.: ...What's that, now? Mayor? Me? Hank Hoffman Jr.: It's mighty nice o' y'all to say so, but I ain't the type to hang my hat on the highest peg in the house jes' cos' I was first through the door... Hank Hoffman Jr.: I figure if this place ever grows big enough that there's mayorin' fixin' to git done, the good people of the town'll make a mayor for their own selves. Hank Hoffman Jr.: Naw, I'm more of a backroom boy. I'll jes' park my wagon here in this ol' shackle an' knuckle down to some good, honest labour. Hank Hoffman Jr.: Y'all be careful out there now, y'hear? Hank Hoffman Jr.: An' be sure to come by an' visit every once in a while. Hank Hoffman Jr.: Ol' Hank ain't goin' nowhere! Hank Hoffman Jr.: Whaddya say, Hero, ol' pardner? I can count on you, can't I? Hank Hoffman Jr.: If y'all come across a body pinin' for pastures new, jes' go on ahead an' sing this place's praises, y'hear? Hank Hoffman Jr.: Except for... Aw, shoot! I clean forgot about that little ol' froggy frog! The hoppity varmint asked me if I couldn't maybe see my way to helpin' him out some... Hank Hoffman Jr.: Guess this ain't such an easy place for a critter no bigger 'n a can o' beans to make a home, seein' as how it done got so busy an' all... Hank Hoffman Jr.: Say, while y'all are here... You recall the froggy frog I told y'all about last time around? I can't sit still for tryin' to figure the slippery little varmint out... Hank Hoffman Jr.: Critter's been here since even before I done rolled my one-horse wagon into town... Hank Hoffman Jr.: An' I ain't never heard of a frog could talk jes' like a human bean before... Hank Hoffman Jr.: But we got ourselves a talkin' horse in town now too, so maybe it's jes' me don't know about such things... Hank Hoffman Jr.: And if that ain't queer enough for y'all, that little froggy frog done turned out to be the king o' the whole durned place! Hank Hoffman Jr.: Why, I sure am glad I came all the way out here to found this crazy town... {{spoiler|end}}
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